This is a reflection on the Mass readings of the day.
From today’s psalm: “Why, O LORD, do you reject me; why hide from me your face?”
To anyone consistent in their commitment to daily dialogue with Jesus, the moment comes when this question resonates oh-so-deeply.
The path of sanctification, which for most of those who embark upon it is a gradual path and process that extends over time, may be defined as detachment from sin, self, and created things, and the filling of the soul with love for and union with God.
Souls who have come some way on this path and have had real experiences of God in prayer may suddenly feel that He is hiding from them. The more intense the experience of God has been, the more intense the feeling of abandonment when this “hiding” occurs.
This sense of loss feels like a step backward in the spiritual life. Here I was, systematically avoiding sin and maybe even making some voluntary sacrifices of things that I liked, and I had a sense of growing closer to God. I have remained consistent in my commitment to daily prayer. But now, all of a sudden, I feel like God just isn’t there. What am I doing wrong? It is as if God had come into my soul, ultimately found it distasteful, and left.
The reality is that this is just one more step in the purification process. Whereas we take some steps ourselves in that process, such as striving to avoid sin and become less attached to created things, this experience in prayer is a sign that God is starting to take over our purification process, which is like the engine in a car taking over for the little starter motor. It is a time, more than ever, to be faithful to our prayer commitment, trusting (albeit blindly!) that God is undertaking something great.
The writings of St. Teresa of Avila (Interior Castles) and St. John of the Cross (Ascent of Mount Carmel and Dark Night of the Soul) provide descriptions and explanations of these phenomena of prayer that can be highly illuminating. Also, there are many more modern spiritual writers who reflect on the works of these saints and also provide beneficial enlightenment. But for the soul that truly trusts in God, it may be enough simply to know that one has an opportunity here to share in the particular suffering of Jesus whereby He exclaimed from the Cross, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” (Cf. Mt. 27:46)
The first reading and the Gospel passage today beautifully highlight the virtues of humility and trust needed by the Psalmist as he cried out to God, feeling rejected.
Job’s argumentation to his friends is an eloquent tribute to God’s sovereignty. He as much as says, “God has both right and might as Creator. Even if I had a legitimate complaint against Him, I wouldn’t voice it, because what can one do? He is all-powerful, and He has a right to our unquestioning obedience, because He’s the one who created us! The most I can do is beg for His kindness and mercy.”
In today’s gospel, people called by Jesus put Him off and delay Him based on human reasoning–which actually sounds rather legitimate! Burying the dead, saying goodbye to one’s family…But what Jesus essentially does is play the sovereignty card to which Job refers in the first reading. When God says jump, you say “how high,” and let everything else take care of itself.
It is to this sovereignty that we must appeal during periods of desolation in prayer. Ours must not be an attitude of indignation or rebellion, nor even of human reasoning or self-doubt. His sovereign majesty and love deserve trust, which trumps literally every other possible consideration in our spiritual life.
Ideas for conversation with the Lord: When you find yourself in a time that prayer becomes difficult for any reason–persistent distractions, or a sense of abandonment–make your words to the Lord ones of unconditional praise, trust, and submission to His Providence and will. And know that His effectiveness for your spiritual growth in closeness to Him is more powerful than ever.
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